How to stop struggling and own your value

I know so many of us often struggle with owning our value, and being able to share ourselves without fear or shame. Sometimes this struggle comes when we are in a position where we need to capital-M-market ourselves in the business world. Sometimes it happens more generally in life, whether it’s feeling confident sharing our perspective in a meeting, stepping up to take on an intimidating personal project, or offering something of ourselves when we know we have some wisdom or experience to share.

I was recently listening to a podcast about marketing (like ya do - in this case an episode of Tim Ferriss’s show), and came across this beautiful passage by the ever-insightful author and marketing expert Seth Godin. He was speaking about issues encountered by leaders in all fields when it comes to marketing themselves, and how “pitching leads” often feels empty, self-serving, and false.

He talks about the importance of empathy, of taking the focus off yourself, and understanding that other people are looking to grow, to be seen and heard, and to learn. And that offering of yourself needn’t be self-centered as it feels. When we shift the perspective off of us and our needs, and see it in a light of generosity instead, everything changes:

“As soon as you can adopt the posture that you are needed to do a generous act, that someone in worse shape than you is drowning and that you have something to offer them. it shifts from a selfish act that is shameful to a generous act that is making a difference… Once we realize that there actually is somebody that would miss us if we were gone, then we can get out of our head and realize we are not doing this to get in the light or hide from the light; we are doing this because someone else needs us.”

-Seth Godin

I love this because it is so in-line with the “work in progress” value that I hold dear. Seeing our lives and our personal growth trajectories as always evolving means that while there is always someone ahead of you (whatever that means), there are also many people behind you, and that at any point, you have just as much to offer as you have to learn.

So, what can you do today to share something you know?

What would change if you believed there were people who were waiting for your unique perspective?

Gillian BenAry